stunned!

i can't believe it! cp is a woman? well a blooming odd girl, going about doing that stuff! she certainly fooled me! hm. well offered the olive branch, hope she realises that one of us is real. so stunned i need a cuppa tea. how ever does she know all that [if youre under 36 clear off] that sm sex\stuff? i never knew anything like that in my life...but its all there in her poor little head. oh dear. she can't have had a proper mum at all. been in bad company or something. on the other hand i found those bits quite entertaining but what dragged me out the saddle was of course these threatening 'evil comes to get u ' stuff. either she don't know what she's saying or she does. like a medium. but you might know i would ride to the flaming rescue. O Christ when i thought cp was a bloke i sang him 'bird on a wire' ...no wonder she blocked me!! obviously didn't cheer her up much at all. she thinks we're telling HER she needs something for depression? its us what just looked very hard at the pills.

anyhow my day. Apart from Madameselle Pinkerton blowing me brains out I had a really good day. Sort of. I read 'war of art' and he's absolutely right and thats what i got to take on board, and do the flaming lot. But he says stop taking meds... in case resistance lets you play sick/victim a nd you lose the way again. Well i try it, i suppose. Anyway i come home and i don't know...he says get the chaos out of your life first. that always means hswk right? but its the middle of the night....when can i start? turn pro, he says. what in a week? you know he tried for donkeys years to succed...yet i never heard of the one film he got done. but i know i'm certain that 'war of art' is true as can be!!

apart from that pts all happy [particularly the one who thinks h's 10 years old] and Olu just discovered i can be a real mate in need. so i'm glad of that, its taking her ages to find her feet.

WELL GODS BLESS POOR CP, I HOPE S/ HE GOT THE GUTS TO GO ON WITH THE STORY.